Category: self-help

Honest

FabrizioLeave a comment

Honesty can only work when it’s two-way.

You can’t be honest if you do not accept others to be honest with you as well, and you can’t demand honesty if you are not honest in the first place yourself.

It’s about building trust and knowing that the other is going to be on your side when it matters. Sometimes by putting you in front of harsh truths, sometimes by telling you well timed lies.

Saying “let’s be honest with each other” is a commitment for the long term, something you have to start building day-in and day-out, with practice and consistency.

It’s not something for a two-hours meeting.

No competition

FabrizioLeave a comment

Help, gratitude, kindness. There’s no competition when you start practicing them.

If you help somebody and another person does the same, all the better. If you are grateful for something, and then something else, and another thing yet, there’s just more to be gained. If you are kind by default, and your neighbour is kind too, and their neighbours too, it’s a great thing for the whole community.

We are so often stuck in a constant race that we easily forget how not everything rewards the first and forgets the others.

Talk

FabrizioLeave a comment

Talk about what’s holding you back.

Talk about that feeling you feel before speaking in front of others.

Talk about the fear that never let you leap.

Talk about how unease you are when somebody asks a direct question.

Talk about the challenge in putting your work out there.

Talk about how difficult it is to say you were wrong.

Talk about the knots in your stomach before meeting someone you like.

Because as you talk about all of this, you take the first step to make it all go away.

Celebrate

FabrizioLeave a comment

At the beginning of this year, I had a few things I wanted to achieve in 2019.

Now I can say I have managed to stick to my three resolutions. I am particularly happy, and surprised, by the fact that I have managed to blog every day. It’s not always been easy, not always rewarding, at times almost a burden, and yet 368 blog posts later I am proud I have continued doing it.

It helped my confidence in writing, cleared my thoughts, cristallized some ideas. It made me face the fear of the blank page (and blank mind) in many occasions, as well as overcome the pressure of metrics and analytics. And most of all, it strenghtened my practice and made me even more comfortable in the day-to-day act of doing.

If you also have something to be proud of tonight, remember to celebrate.

Not the new year, not a new beginning, not the hope that it will be different. Celebrate your success, the difficulties you’ve overcome, the intensity of achieving. And celebrate continuity, because change is very rarely the product of a sudden revolution.

This one is to me, and to you.

Happy New Year!

The journey

FabrizioLeave a comment

When a lot of importance is put on a single goal, there’s a huge risk to lose perspective.

As the goal is set and gets nearer, corners are cut, shortcuts are sought, poor work is normalized. And soon, the initial goal is either discounted or made unreachable. There is no more excitement in getting there.

This is why the way things are done are more important than the things themselves and the places they take us.

Goals are temporary and variable, practices are grounded and stable.

Keep a wide view on the horizon as you put one step after the other, relentlessly, day after day. You might spot new destinations, and at the very least you will have developed the muscles that will allow you to continue the journey.