Tag: fear

Where it hurts

FabrizioLeave a comment

When you are rejected, the opportunity is not in “better luck next time”, or “it’s their loss”, or “you are better than this”.

The opportunity is in taking a step back and checking where it hurts.

Are you disappointed because you cannot pay the next bill or because you were enjoying what you were doing? Because you have to cancel your next vacation or because you genuinely thought you were delivering your best job? Because you have to face the questions of family and friends or because you felt for once you had something to give to a cause?

When we take the time to check where it hurts, we can more easily spot what is next. And it might be something utterly surprising.

Here to stay

FabrizioLeave a comment

When somebody attacks you on some of the features that define you (your work, your values, your reputation), all you can do is continue nurturing those very same features.

Going head-to-head can be fascinating in a sense. Demolishing the attacker’s argument, pointing out all the good that you have done, bringing people onboard to testify on that goodness, providing evidence that what you say is correct. Fascinating, and costly. And eventually it will most likely play in the hands of your opposer.

You are in it for the long term, not for the next news cycle. Work, values, reputation are built over time. Let others craft and enjoy the hourly commentary, the back-and-forth, the speculation, as it will be soon gone.

You, on the other hand, are here to stay.

Paths

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There are many paths to success.

And so all you have to do, day in and day out, is walk the path that leads where you want to go, in a way you are comfortable with and that aligns with your values and stories.

If you let others define this for you, you are missing on the best part.

Out of the room

FabrizioLeave a comment

It is difficult not to be bothered by a fly in a closed room.

For as much as you force yourself into a state of flow, the fly will make its presence noticeable incessantly, and eventually you will be left with two options: either be distracted by it – shooing it away, having your pressure and heartbeat rise, calling it names, trying to catch it -, or open the room to let it out and continue your activity.

There are two points to this short and conventional story.

The first is that, more often than not, we choose the distraction over the solution. It feels easier, we don’t have to stand, it gives us a prompt and lasting excuse not to do the work (well), and it feeds an illusion of time passing.

The second is that if we want to do the work (well), we first of all need to keep flies and other distractions out of the room where the work is done.

It is that simple.

Superficial

FabrizioLeave a comment

How much information do we consume daily? And out of that, how much information do we understand, evaluate, put into our daily practice, and eventually use to improve?

We have never been more exposed to facts, theories, news, practices, frameworks.

We have never been more superficial.