When most of your time is spent doing things you were doing yesterday.
When the most common answer to ideas is “something to keep in mind for the future”.
When you get lost in planning and details, postponing what matters in search of perfect.
When you and those around you are busy, and yet that busyness does not bring you any closer to what you want to achieve.
It’s time to leap.
Repeatedly, over the course of your career, you will be asked to conform to certain standards or rules.
You need to meet certain requirements to get a job, for specific roles you will be asked specific qualifications, if you get to be a manager there are certain procedures you will have to adhere to. It is normal, and that’s what makes things somewhat reliable, trustworthy, known.
The fact is, there are two ways to go about standards and rules.
The first is to follow them. If they say you have to study a certain language to get a job, you do study it. If they say you need a certificate to be promoted, you do get the certificate. If they say you have to follow a procedure to advance your purpose, you do follow it.
The second is to pick them. Does it make sense? is the key question on this path. Will study that language add something to my value as an employee? Will it add to my story and my strengths? Will it make me more frustrated, because once I am done with that role, I will never be asked to use that language ever again?
You will probably surf between the two ways at different stages in your career. What matters most though, is that you understand that there are two ways, not one only.
Once you get to know what you are here for, what your value is, what your strengths are, what you have to offer and what you don’t have to offer, what sets you apart from the rest of us. Does it make sense to follow a rule that does not serve all of this?
Culture is what you do.
It is how you treat people around you, the times you say yes to a request of help, the way you say no to preserve focus, the work you deliver every day, the amount of hours you dedicate to things that nurture your cause, the decisions you make and how you make them, the people you carry with you and those that are never part of it. It is, first and foremost, the journey and not the destination.
Not only.
Culture is what you do when no one is watching.
It’s impossible to fake culture, and so you might be on the wrong track if you regret helping others the very moment you say yes, if you get distracted from new and shiny things that lead you astray, if you surround yourself with people that are like you, think like you and act like you.
And.
Culture is what you do when things are dire.
Most are good sharing when they have plenty, cheering people up when life is wonderful, leading when the cash comes in, giving freedom when there’s not much at stake, asking people to contribute when the decision has already been taken.
Think about this as you go through history and think of examples that well represent and tell your culture. It will make it stronger.
Influence has a bad reputation.
We think of influence as something that is done to people, to us. We do not like the idea of having our thoughts magically changed, and so we do not like those who try to change them nor the act itself. To be fair, influence has been used by people to impose their view on others for quite some time, so no wonder we get defensive any time someone even just mentions the word.
What if, instead, influence would be an act of empathy?
If you really want to change someone’s mind on a moral or political matter, you’ll need to see things from that person’s angle as well as your own. And if you do truly see it the other person’s way – deeply and intuitively – you might even find your own mind opening in response.
Jonathan Haidt, The Rigtheous Mind
It’s not for us to judge what others do.
There are systems in place for that, and as individuals and human beings, we should not feel entitled to decide if other people’s behaviour is right or wrong.
Today we are given the illusion that we have this right, that it is necessary for us to let everybody know what we think about this or that event.
We have lost the capability to use others’ actions for self-reflection (and betterment), and we just cherry pick facts and happenings that confirm to ourselves and the world we are already better, smarter, braver, fairer.
We have lost the empathy to understand others behave like they do not because they are mean, devious, malicious, but just because they are facing our very same challenges, trying to make sense of a life that does not help them in the effort.
We have lost the courage necessary to look within ourselves first, to sit in front of a mirror and think about who we are and who we are not, the things we like and we want more of, the things we dislike and we want less of, and we drown in a continuous flow of superficial interactions that end up being shouts in the dark.
We have lost, and we are losing every day the sense of perspective, of what is important, of why should I care, or what is my role in all this.
We have lost, but we can take all of this back. It’s a choice we make every day.
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