Your audience

Imagine if you would have to act as the perfect employee to impress your boss and at the same time as a lazy employee to get along with your peers. If you would have to pretend to be the family man at home and at the same time the ruthless playboy with your friends. If you would have to be sloppy and quick at work and at the same time meticulous and detailed in your free time.

At best, everyone (including you) would have some serious issues figuring out who you are.

This is the same impression many B2B companies give.

They have one story for the investors, one for the customers, one for the partners, one for the analysts. Each department tells it in a different way, using different language, and focusing on different themes. The result is total confusion.

If you want your brand to be authentic, define what that means, check regularly whether the definition is still relevant, and stick to it.

That’s how you find your audience.

It does

I wish I could say that cutting corners does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that being mean to others, shouting, and badmouthing them does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that underpaying employees and pursuing loops to avoid taxes does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that hiding, pretending to work, faking a smile does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that being bossy and controlling does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that dumping trash in the environment, not caring about the community, avoiding regulations does not work, but it does.

I wish I could say that not acknowledging your mistakes does not work, but it does.

The point is, what does “work” mean to you? What is success? Are you happy with the way you carry out your business, your hobby, your profession?

Also, how would you expect others to behave when you are on the receiving end?

Do it for yourself

In the parenting journey, there comes a time when you realize you have to give your kids control. It happens quite early, to be honest. It’s when they start to go out play with other kids by themselves, without adult’s supervision.

You have to start give them control, even gradually. And be there to help them handle the consequences of the choices they make. Sure, you do that because you want them to grow as independent, resilient human beings. But you do that also for a very egoistic reason: you simply do not have the energy and time to deal with all the questions they have, to asses all the situations they come to you with, to fix all the problems they face.

In the leadership journey, you will find something similar. If you feel overwhelmed, if you find yourself wondering whether your team can do anything without your input, if you want everything under your own supervision. It’s time to give away control.

If not for your team, do it for yourself.

The benefit will be immediate.

Comfortable

Change is hard, complaining is easy.

That’s why we default to the latter when things get tough. For as much as we are unsatisfied with the current situation, it is a situation we know, we are familiar with, we understand. By complaining, we keep it under some sort of control and we normalize it.

Complaining is not bad per se. It can help us look inside and understand what it is we do not like. Of course, the problem starts when complaining becomes a constant state. We complain about work, the boss, about our relationships, the kids, our friends, our family, the government. That’s when we need to find the courage to get out of the comfortable spiral and actually do change.

It usually goes, change yourself first, then try to change the situation.

Not the other way around.

On board

When you create something, some will not like it.

When you share an idea, some will find it impractical.

When you launch a project, some will say it will never work.

When you have a solution, some will argue it’s not the right one.

When you find a problem, some will say they can live with it.

Of course, the point has never been to have everybody agree. The point is doing something that feels right, and doing it consistently and continuously enough, so that others can find it and come on board.