Make it matter

When somebody tells you that you are not ready for a project, a new challenge, a promotion, there are two ways you can react.

You can behave as if you were not given the responsibility. That’s easy, because you were not. It is the attitude of “why should I?”, of “it won’t matter”.

Or you can behave as if you were given the responsibility. Do what you would have. It is the attitude of “I can”, of “I will make it matter”.

Which one will you choose?

A break

Breaks should not be a privilege, a sign of laziness, something you are embarassed to ask.

Breaks are important for two reasons.

They help to take distance from what you regularly do. And in doing so, you get the chance to reinforce your dedication and find new ways to approach old problems.

They also promote the idea that no matter who you are, no matter how important the work you are doing, the world is not going to end if you pause.

Take frequent breaks, and take some long ones too throughout the year. Give them all of your attention and dedication. Make them real.

You should be proud of it.

Keep options open

In most circumstances, the sooner you get to solution-mode, the fewer the possibilities you will have considered.

When you do that with other people’s problems, you are preventing them from finding a way that fits with their lives and with which they are comfortable.

Keep options open, for as long as you can.

Praiseworthy

When you do something praiseworthy, you will get approval.

The feedback you get is going to make you feel good, and possibly you will set out to do some other things that will be worth the praise of your peers and audience.

Are you in it for the doing or for the approval?

That is a silly question to ask, because most likely you have mixed motives.

The question to ask, instead, is: would you do it anyway if there was no approval?

That’s how you define passion.

Under control

One of the biggest and most painful mistakes you can make is to believe it is about you.

Things happen all the time, people have thoughts and feelings that make them behave one way or the other, words are said and opinions expressed more than we can appreciate. And it is not about you.

Making it personal is the opposite of committing. It is a way to hide, to postpone, to not do.

It is also a strong instict, as each one of us is the main character to their own story.

Just keep it under control.