Tag: resolutions

The primary driver

Fabrizio1 Comment

It is extremely important to dedicate time to intentionally define success.

And while doing that, you have to consider the difference between success that is dependent on your own actions and success that is dependent on others’ actions or environmental circumstances.

An example.

Say you want to write a blog post a week for the next year.

Actually writing a blog post a week for the next year depends pretty much solely on you. You should have started yesterday, you could start now, you can do it. It is up to you.

Getting people to read your blog post every week, having an increasing audience month after month, closing the year with 1,000 people registered to your newsletter. These are all things that do not depend on you. Of course, you can try to influence those, but truth is you have no idea if any of that is going to happen.

So, when you define success make the distinction.

That does not mean that finding an audience, increasing your list, getting your content to more and more people does not matter. It is just out of your control, and it should never be the primary driver for your doing.

To your advantage

FabrizioLeave a comment

There is one absolute truth. And that truth is that no one is ever going to care as much as you do.

No one is going to care about how brilliant you are. And you ARE brilliant. But no one is going to care. Of course, that can change if you put your brilliance at the service of something that touches enough people, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Without getting demotivated because for a long time no one will care.

No one is going to care about the good job you are doing. And you ARE doing good job. But no one is going to care. Of course, that can change if your job touches enough people, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Without giving up because for a long time no one will care.

No one is going to care about your success, your breakthrough, your next big idea. And you MIGHT achieve just that at some point. But no one is going to care. With the exception, perhaps, of those few who have been touched by it, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Because you have not cared that for a long time no one cared.

The point is, no one cares is no longer an excuse. It is a reality. One that you need to turn around to your advantage.

When will you do that?

To mentor

Fabrizio1 Comment

You do not have to be a master to mentor. You do not have to be the best at what you do, neither you need to be an expert in what you do. You might have a passion, but that is just a like most of the time. You might feel competent and knowledgeable, but if you are completely honest that’s probably not how you feel in most cases.

If you believe any of the above is necessary to mentor, you are telling yourself a false story, you are giving up to resistance, you are pushing back something you would genuinely benefit from.

To mentor, you merely need to have experience and to be willing to give it away.

And when that is the case, you can start mentoring now. You will get back everything you put in. And more.

Stepping stone

FabrizioLeave a comment

I am sorry does not heal the wound.

It does not solve the problem, it does not undo what was done, it does not wipe out an unpleasant memory.

I am sorry is not a wand to wave at distressing situations. It does not draw a plan for the future and it does not promise it will not happen again. It does not go any farther than you want it to go. It often does not fill the gap. Very rarely it changes the narrative. And it never is the end to a conversation.

I am sorry does not do any of the above.

Yet without I am sorry none of the above can ever happen.

I am sorry is the essential stepping stone to what comes next in any kind of relationship.

What actually is next depends on you.

How far

Fabrizio1 Comment

At some point, you have to realize that busyness is hurting people around you.

It hurts your boss, who cannot count on you to deliver what you should.

It hurts colleagues and team members, who have to deal with somebody who is unprepared and unresponsive.

It hurts your partner and kids, who never know when you will be around with body and mind.

It hurts your friends, who are stuck listening to the stories you keep telling.

Many consider busyness as a measure of success. It is actually more often a measure of how far you are pushing your responsibilities.