Tag: resistance

Change is additive

FabrizioLeave a comment

Change does not wipe away what was. It builds on it.

And when we change, it is often so that what we build looks way too similar to what was. After all, it is easier to fall back on what is known than it is to imagine the unknown.

It is ok, as change is an additive process. It is made of layers on top of each others. Some familiar, some peculiar. While you go, you will realize that change is happening, even when it does not seem so.

That is when you start to appreciate the journey and understand that the destination is mere chance.

The primary driver

Fabrizio1 Comment

It is extremely important to dedicate time to intentionally define success.

And while doing that, you have to consider the difference between success that is dependent on your own actions and success that is dependent on others’ actions or environmental circumstances.

An example.

Say you want to write a blog post a week for the next year.

Actually writing a blog post a week for the next year depends pretty much solely on you. You should have started yesterday, you could start now, you can do it. It is up to you.

Getting people to read your blog post every week, having an increasing audience month after month, closing the year with 1,000 people registered to your newsletter. These are all things that do not depend on you. Of course, you can try to influence those, but truth is you have no idea if any of that is going to happen.

So, when you define success make the distinction.

That does not mean that finding an audience, increasing your list, getting your content to more and more people does not matter. It is just out of your control, and it should never be the primary driver for your doing.

To your advantage

FabrizioLeave a comment

There is one absolute truth. And that truth is that no one is ever going to care as much as you do.

No one is going to care about how brilliant you are. And you ARE brilliant. But no one is going to care. Of course, that can change if you put your brilliance at the service of something that touches enough people, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Without getting demotivated because for a long time no one will care.

No one is going to care about the good job you are doing. And you ARE doing good job. But no one is going to care. Of course, that can change if your job touches enough people, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Without giving up because for a long time no one will care.

No one is going to care about your success, your breakthrough, your next big idea. And you MIGHT achieve just that at some point. But no one is going to care. With the exception, perhaps, of those few who have been touched by it, in a consistent way, over a period of time. Because you have not cared that for a long time no one cared.

The point is, no one cares is no longer an excuse. It is a reality. One that you need to turn around to your advantage.

When will you do that?

Use what you want to run from

Fabrizio1 Comment

Your boss who seems so confident is afraid too.

The colleague who has always something relevant to share is anxious too.

That speaker you love for the way they thrill the audience is nervous too.

The successful entrepreneur you are reading about is worried too.

The point is not making fear, anxiety, and the like go away. The point is using them to your advantage. Can fear push you to get out of your comfort zone and see what is out there? Can anxiety help you run through different scenarios and find them not as scary as they initially seemed? Can nervousness be the reason why you practice one more time? Can worry fire up a need to consult different perspective without getting stuck?

Make the most of what you have, even when at first it seems like something you just want to run away from.

To mentor

Fabrizio1 Comment

You do not have to be a master to mentor. You do not have to be the best at what you do, neither you need to be an expert in what you do. You might have a passion, but that is just a like most of the time. You might feel competent and knowledgeable, but if you are completely honest that’s probably not how you feel in most cases.

If you believe any of the above is necessary to mentor, you are telling yourself a false story, you are giving up to resistance, you are pushing back something you would genuinely benefit from.

To mentor, you merely need to have experience and to be willing to give it away.

And when that is the case, you can start mentoring now. You will get back everything you put in. And more.