Tag: relationships

Whether you win or you lose

FabrizioLeave a comment

Whether you win or you lose, you need to be able to do two things.

First, appreciate your performance – which means giving an appropriate value to your role. Because whether you win or you lose this time, the outcome of the next challenge will be based on how well you understand what went well and what did not go as well.

Second, extend a hand to your opponent – no matter if it’s a person or a situation. Because whether you win or you lose this time, you ought to be able to recognize that some things are out of your control and deserve your unconditional respect.

Give and build

FabrizioLeave a comment

Do you give trust or do you build trust?

The answer is clearly yes.

Trust is something you have to give and that needs building and strengthening day after day.

And for both aspects of trust you need actions, not words.

Say it

FabrizioLeave a comment

Who can you say it to?

Who can you talk to about the pain you are feeling, the challenge you are going through, the anxiety, the lack of focus, the impossibility to achieve anything meaningful in this particular period? Who can you say that to?

There’s always somebody you can talk to about how you are today and why it is not great.

And if there’s nobody, at least say it to those who are affected by it.

It’s fair for them. And it’s fair for you.

Forceful

FabrizioLeave a comment

You can’t pretend to know what’s better for others. Not even your dear ones.

And you can’t pretend others will come to you when they need something. Or express that in a way that makes what they need clear.

What you can and should do, instead, is to be aware of and vocal about what is better for you. And be adamant about it.

It might actually be so that it will help others figure out their own stuff. Or at least, if you are the person that will help or not.

Losing

FabrizioLeave a comment

How quickly can you get out of an argument?

How quickly can you say, “it does not matter”, and forget about it.

How quickly can you say, “you might be right”, and shift your perspective.

How quickly can you say, “we don’t agree”, and proceed together.

How quickly can you say, “that’s alright”, and put the difference out of your mind.

Just a reminder that no matter how hard you try, you can’t win an argument.