Tag: interviewing

Tension

FabrizioLeave a comment

We live in the tension between a version of us we despise and a version of us we would like to become.

And we also live in the tension between our failures, which we see so vividly, and other people’s successes, which we fantasise a lot about.

When we get going, we often reach for the positive extreme. We are at our best and we aim to emulate those who have succeeded before. We know we can. Then we meet criticism, bad weather, rejection, difficulties of various kind, and we fall to the negative extreme. We are suddenly incapable to complete the most trivial task, unworthy of anybody’s attention, care, empathy.

Most reality, though, happens in the middle. And that’s also where we can anchor to achieve real and incremental progress.

It’s when we embrace the version of us we are today and the work we are doing today – neither bad nor good – that we get rid of the tension and we can start enjoying the journey.

Too serious

FabrizioLeave a comment

Don’t take yourself too seriously. Make sure you have enough space to even make fun of your failures, your fears, your weaknesses.

We are wired to spot the threatening, the bad, the negative. But for most of us, in our modern world, that is very often overreaction. Bombing a presentation, missing a quarter’s goals, getting rejected is not going to be defining our own persona.

Unless you let it.

Being fair

FabrizioLeave a comment

A big problem with offering $85,000 for a position budgeted at $130,000 is that very soon the person to whom you are offering the position is going to find out (even if you do not tweet about the whole situation).

And when they do, two things will happen.

First, they will feel cheated, demotivated, disengaged. They won’t be able to perform at their best, because nobody does when the counterpart sees the relationship as a mere transaction.

Second, they will start spending most of their resources to be paid what it is fair for them to be paid, whether that is at the company or somewhere else.

Was the hustle worth it?

The inner critic

FabrizioLeave a comment

If you can’t give credit to yourself, how do you expect to give credit to others?

If you can’t be compassionate with your feelings, give yourself room to think, appreciate what you have achieved and get excited for what comes next. How can you do all that for others?

All your world wants is for you to love yourself.

Go deeper

FabrizioLeave a comment

What makes you unique is not that you are customer-focused and have great communication skills.

What makes you unique is that you enjoy the challenge of finding the right audience for the company you work at, and that you dedicate effort to buy everyone in the story you are going to tell.

Lazy adjectives and terminology are particularly harmful when you use them to present yourself in the job market. They are shortcuts that flatten the contribution you have to make. They just make you feel like everyone else.

When you are about to use any of them, ask yourself three questions.

  • What do I mean with that?
  • In what situation have I proved that?
  • How can I describe that to my friend?

It will help you go deeper and unlock what it is that make you truly stand out.