Weaknesses have the tendency to creep up on strengths, until they obfuscate them and leave them behind.
We give way more importance to what we are not good at, we often set goals to fill gaps we might have, we end up setting ourselves up for failure. And by doing so, we drift farther away from what makes us who we are.
Nobody is asking us to be good at everything but us.
We get attached to things, and that hurts the most.
We get attached to things that bear no real weight in our lives. Winning or losing an argument will not make us a better human being. Getting promoted or not will not make us a better worker. A higher or a lower salary will often not change our lifestyle that much. The new idea we have failed to promote and develop will not make of us a failure.
We get attached to things, and we should just let go.
That is when a wealth of possibilities will unfold.
When you put off something repeatedly over a period of time, you should face the fact that it is never going to happen. And so, you should either delegate that or remove it entirely from your schedule.
Every other action you are taking (marking as unread, moving to tomorrow, making a post-it, setting a reminder on your phone) is just additional clutter.
That thing is not important to you.
Get over it.
If you are in a position of power, be mindful not to complain to people who report to you.
Work is probably tougher, you are asked to juggle a load of different tasks, you are supposed to find time to talk to people, you negotiate, compromise, often work after hours, and I am sure at times it feels like simply too much to handle.
Yet, no one has forced that position onto you. You have a role that reflects the additional burdens, and most likely a salary that does that too. And if people who report to you can find the empathy to appreciate your difficulties, you are certainly more equipped (or you should be) to find the empathy to not push your frustration down the ranks.
Your organization might be flat, your management style open, friendly, and transparent.
But gripes go up.
That’s the only way you can affect change.
Private Reiben: Hey, so, Captain, what about you? I mean, you don’t gripe at all?
Captain Miller: I don’t gripe to you, Reiben. I’m a captain. There’s a chain of command. Gripes go up, not down. Always up. You gripe to me, I gripe to my superior officer, so on, so on, and so on. I don’t gripe to you. I don’t gripe in front of you.
Save Private Ryan
Not listening is not only ignoring.
It is also finding weak reasons to continue on the path that is less risky, motivating the current situation with urgency, hiding behind busyness, coming up with own ways to define reality, diminishing the arguments of others, expressing agreement with words and not follow up with actions.
And most of all, it is about talking.
You've got this 