At some point, you have to realize that busyness is hurting people around you. It hurts your boss, who cannot count on you to deliver what you should. It hurts colleagues and team members, who have to deal with somebody who is unprepared and unresponsive. It hurts your partner and kids, who never know when … Continue reading How far
Category: leadership
Overestimating
We are bad at communicating in written form. We overestimate our capability to share meaning via a written message, and most importantly to share the underlying emotions, mainly because we fail to understand that our audience is often in a different state of mind. Two considerations. If you are about to send a written message, … Continue reading Overestimating
Rapport
Just because you say it needs to happen, doesn't mean it will happen. If you give somebody an urgency, you better frame it in a way that makes sense to them or to the greater cause. Important is subjective, even when you are close, even when you work in the same team, even when there … Continue reading Rapport
A different way
When you feel like you want to lash out at somebody. Get aggressive, forget about manners, say it as it is. Ask a provocative question, answer in a passive aggressive tone. Send an irate reply, or no reply at all. Take it public, escalate it, raise the flag. There is one question you should ask … Continue reading A different way
Old friends
If you are a manager and you are starting at a new company, it is great that you have already some key people from your past experiences that you would like to bring onboard to fill key roles and take important responsibilities. As you do that, be mindful of two things though. The people in … Continue reading Old friends
Harsh
You can resort to raising your voice to establish a power dynamic in an argument you are having, but you will not make the argument go away. You can rush telling your piece before the other person has even done speaking, but you will not appreciate what the other has to say. You can shout … Continue reading Harsh
Forcing
Nobody is forcing you to stay where you are. Somebody perhaps asked, or maybe it is exactly where you wanted to be, or it might be that it is fear that's sticking you to that seat. You might feel the responsibility. You are probably telling yourself there is no other option. You are asking others … Continue reading Forcing
No solution
Caring about others, about a situation, about an outcome it's not finding an immediate solution. It is more about persistence. Asking how someone is, inquiring about the status of a project, ensuring people who come to you with issues, fears, troubles, complaints feel heard and respected, coming up with ways to help and continuing doing … Continue reading No solution
Connection
We underestimate the importance of talking with somebody when things are bad. We tend to close, fantasize, make assumptions, build on our own emotions, point fingers, second guess, and in general spiral down in a hole we can't get ourselves out of. There is always somebody to talk to. Sometimes that is your partner, a … Continue reading Connection
Would you take it?
Are you into leadership because of the power, the role, the status, or because of the challenges, the responsibility, the people that allow you to lead? It seems like a trivial question, and the answer is probably, for most, somewhat in the middle. But I can't count the leaders who stop at the prestige and … Continue reading Would you take it?