Tag: values

Two buckets

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There is a tension between execution and challenge.

Execution is about getting things done. When you execute, you act on assumptions, hoping that those assumptions are correct. Assumptions come from experience and from socialization (the assumptions of others), and in most cases they help us get by.

Challenge is about changing things. That’s when assumptions get questioned, when you are seeking a different way, something new. Challenge is a more solitary job than execution, and it requires additional energy to buy people into your new perspective.

Balancing the two is necessary. If you only execute, things will not progress, you will not progress. If you only challenge, you will soon deplete all your energy, and eventually be left alone.

What are you going to settle for?

What are you going to fight for?

Be aware of the composition of these two buckets.

Lessons

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You can find great lessons everywhere, even in books you are just reading for pleasure and enjoyment.

“There is satisfaction,” he said to Dalinar, “in creating a list of things you can actually accomplish, then removing them one at a time. As I said, a simple joy.”

“Unfortunately, I’m needed for bigger things than shopping.”

“Isn’t that always the problem? Tell me, my friend. You talk about your burdens and the difficulty of the decision. What is the cost of a principle?”

“The cost? There shouldn’t be a cost to being principled.”

“Oh? […] Isn’t a principle about what you give up, not what you gain?”

“So it’s all negative?” Dalinar said. “Are you implying that nobody should have principles, because there’s no benefit to them?”

“Hardly,” Nohadon said. “But maybe you shouldn’t be looking for life to be easier because you choose to do something that is right! Personally, I think life is fair. It’s merely that often, you can’t immediately see what balances it.”

Brandon Sanderson, Oathbringer

How much power

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Expectations have the power to shape our reality.

When we go into a situation with low expectations, chances are we will be positively surprised. And the other way around, of course.

This is even more true, and somehow brutal, when applied to relationships. What we expect of and from people vastly impacts the way we think about them, the way we evaluate them and ultimately the way we behave with them.

Nobody can go without expectations.

But we can label them as such, and accept the fact that they are probably unrealistic, as they take only our perspective into consideration.

When we succeed in this, we open up to a whole new set of experiences we can learn from. We end up growing, gradually mitigating future expectations, and eventually behaving with people the way they wish to be treated (vs the way we wish to be treated).

Expectations are like thoughts. We decide how much power to give them.

Finite

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At any one point in time there’s an infinite number of possibilities around you. The number of possibilities to do good is infinite as well.

Sounds like a positive thing, and it is, but if you keep moving from one possibility to the next, if you are overwhelmed by their numbers, if you lose focus distracted by the closest or fanciest one over and over again, that is equivalent to not having any possibility at all.

The understanding that you are finite and can only commit to a limited number of things in the course of your lifetime is needed to make an impact.

Inexpensive

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People around you most likely do not care about your role, your salary, the amount of money in your bank account, how many square metres your house is, in which neighbourhood you live, the cost of the suit you wear or of the car you drive.

What matters to most, instead, is presence, love, attention, affection, care. All things that are inexpensive and available to everyone. Their value is immense.