Structure is what gives predictability. You can expect certain things to happen because the script says so. Structure does not like free thinkers and innovators: somebody else already did all the thinking and the innovating, it is now time to march.
Chaos is the exact opposite. You have to figure out what is going to happen because there is no script. Chaos does not believe in bosses and managers: there is no past experience to replicate or resources to carefully allocate, it is time to connect the dots.
Design your habits and practice so that it is possible to move continuosly between structure and chaos.
That is a feat you will need.
The only thing we have moderate control on is ourselves. What we do. How we react. The way we talk about the events of life. Who we spend time with, and where.
And yet, we spend an incredible amount of energy trying to guide what others think, the random events, what others will decide, and whether they want to spend time with us or not.
Focus on what is within reach.
Eventually, you will have to make peace with the version of yourself you will never be.
With your childhood dreams. With what your family wanted for you. With what you never liked and got inculcated with anyway simply because you were born there. With what has changed and will not come back.
It’s a huge challenge, probably one of the biggest one you’ll face.
What you are not, you simply are not.
Most of what we do goes unnoticed.
Good and bad not always get rewarded or sanctioned as we are used to see in novels and movies. And we are often alone dealing with what follows.
Not only we are main characters to our own movie, we are also the sole interested audience.
Can you accept that?
If you seek change, looking at what the person sitting next to you is doing won’t help much.
At best, it will make an easy excuse to use when you want to fall back to your old habit.
Go as far from the mean as you can, instead. Learn about what’s been tried a few times only, about what’s new, about what’s not been tested yet.
That’s the path to change.