Tag: speaking

For all the parties

FabrizioLeave a comment

Can you ask somebody to help you?

Can you put your ego aside and recognize that somebody else might have a perspective on a matter that would actually improve your own understanding?

Can you step on your fear and embarrassment and ask a simple question that might unlock tremendous progress?

Can you suspend your judgment and assumptions and open yourself to listening to what the other has to say?

Can you accept that somebody would care as much as you do?

Help is the most precious thing there is, for all the parties involved.

We do not leverage that enough in business and organizations.

Doing nothing

FabrizioLeave a comment

If you want to get everything done today, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you keep your queue open to the latest request, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you force yourself to do a task when you are just not in the right mindset, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you put yourself at the center of a mass distraction, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you are asked to explain what you do as you do it, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

There are plenty of ways to do nothing, and arguably just one to actually achieve something.

Take control of your attention.

The different shapes of success

Fabrizio1 Comment

Success comes in different shapes.

Sometimes it is up and to the right. This kind is easy to recognize. It is success that comes from accumulation. More of this, more of that. We just need to be mindful that what we are accumulating is what is best for ourselves, for our dear ones, for our group.

Sometimes it is down and to to the right. This kind is not as intuitive as the first one. It is success that comes from reduction. Less of this, less of that. What makes this particularly challenging is that cutting what is not best (for ourselves, for our dear ones, for our group) gets more difficult over a long period of time.

Sometimes it is right in the middle. Most people feel uncomfortable with this kind. It is success that comes from consistency. One of this today, one of this tomorrow, one of this the day after tomorrow. It turns out, in the long run it is still accumulation (or reduction). Just not as evident, arguably more impactful.

We need to be able to appreciate and celebrate the different shapes of success.

If we don’t, we are stuck in a narrative that is not our own.

The greatest enemy

Fabrizio1 Comment

We are the greatest enemy to our own purpose, satisfaction, betterment, fullfilment.

We tell ourselves stories about the world that merely reflect what we feel and fear. Others will think I am arrogant if I do that. I am not good enough. If only I could get someone who believes in me. They don’t want me here anymore. They don’t care.

We are in charge. And we have the power to change all that. Now.

I may be able to explore my past, recalling memories of incidents where I learned to hide from my life, feeling the churn in my gut that makes (and keeps) me exactly as I am. And I may be able to explore the future person I want to be, my preferred image of myself, my intended self-concept tuned to hope and maybe distracting fantasy. But between the past and the future there’s the Now, with its stubborn realities, with its unpredictability and hidden dangers. There, in the Now, that’s where the real journey is either embraced or rejected, a point at which I must make a choice about facing what I haven’t faced all along — and stick with it.

Dan Oestreich – The mutiny against our conditioning

Give it context

Fabrizio1 Comment

When we make a mistake, that immediately becomes the center of our life. Who we are. What we can achieve. How far we can go.

We should instead put the mistake at the same level of our wins and successes. If we manage to give it context, the mistake will look much less threatening. How many times did we do it right? How often are we proud of our work? How much have we achieved so far? And if we are way down into failure mode, a friend or a partner can help us get out and see.

Mistakes are inevitable, the same way as successes are.