Different hows

When we look at others we look at how they behave, how they look, how they interact with others. We often know very little of how they feel, how they think, how they see the world around them.

When we look at ourselves we look at how we feel, how we think, how we see the world around us. We often know very little of how we behave, how we look, how we interact with others.

That’s why every judgement, every comparison, every attempt to explain is unfair and unbalanced. And we need to learn to live with this.

The lock and the key

First, you need to figure out what story you have to tell.

Second, you need to figure out who might be interested in the story you have to tell.

Third, you have to tell the story.

One and two might be interchangeable, and actually it is generally a good idea to search for a lock and then fashion a key.

But the problem is that most just go with three.

The thing about misunderstandings

What you say is going to be misunderstood.

There’s really not much to say, it’s just the nature of communication. You deliver a message from your own position, with your own understanding, and the other person interprets all of that from their own position, with a different understanding. This happens inevitably, no matter how close the speaker and the listener are. It’s not your fault. It’s not their fault. It’s just how it is.

The only thing you can do about it is to repeat the message over and over again.

Of course, you will become boring after while, people will start telling you they have already heard that, some will make fun of you, others will just stop listening and move on.

But it really is the only thing you can do about misunderstandings.

Just be careful that the message you choose to repeat is really the one that matters to your purpose.