Tag: self-improvement

No real thing

FabrizioLeave a comment

For most people, there is no real thing that is going to be better if you are going to work one more day, or check your email on Christmas day, or take a meeting while your family is gathered for dinner.

It’s just your fear of giving away control and of finding out that you are not that important.

Take a break, go on vacation, spend quality time with your family. I promise you, when you will go back, the same problems and challenges will be there waiting for you.

You might just have some more resources to tackle them.

Have some

FabrizioLeave a comment

You can’t have it all.

It’s a sentence we often hear and one that is incredibly difficult to live by.

Of course, when you think, act, are as if that were true, the single thing that’s left is to understand what is important. Remove the distractions and the infinite opportunities, get them out of the way.

You can’t have it all means you can still have some. The trick is ensuring the “some” is highly relevant.

Living through this

FabrizioLeave a comment

As the holidays get close and the news fill once more with variants and spikes, it is worth reminding that it is ok not to be ok.

It is ok to be anxious, stressed, demotivated. It is ok to not feel like doing anything. It is ok to be languishing and just wanting to give up. It is ok to take days off, to go for a walk in the middle of a busy day, to want to meet others and at the same time dread the moment when that will happen.

All of this is ok, and the moment you are fine with it, you can start expressing how it is. People will feel a little less afar. You will be a little less alone.

We are living through this.

You’ve got this.

Thin line

FabrizioLeave a comment

There is a thin line between your fragility and other people’s fragility.

They often live in the same space.

I don’t like this project – It can be interpreted as an attack, a lack of trust, a doubt on your skils, a revenge for something you once said (your fragility); and at the same time, it can be a manifestation of fear, uncertainty, adversity to risk, a different mindset (other people’s fragility).

Someone not returning your greeting – It can be interpreted as a dislike, a judgement, a strong preference to not spend time with you, a way to send a clear message about the meeting that is about to begin (your fragility); and at the same time, it can be a manifestation of a cluttered mind, uneasiness around others, a disinterest towards socialization, tension for the meeting that is about to begin (other people’s fragility).

Your role is to understand the boundaries of your fragility, the words and actions that trigger it, so that you can extend from there and accept other people’s fragility and their own effort to understand them.

Take the comment on the project and appreciate that it is feeding your lack of trust in your own skills; then move towards the other and sit with them as they explore their own side.

Take the greeting that was not returned and appreciate that it is triggering your struggle to belong, then move towards the other and sit with them as they explore their own side.

When you don’t do this, the thin line grows into a thick wall.

Not the end of the world

FabrizioLeave a comment

A defeat is not the end of the world.

For sure, it hurts. You’ll have to take time to process it. You will be tempted to give way to regrets, complaints, frustation, fury. And sometimes, you should. You will need to regroup with those who have been close to you all along the way. You will grieve, cry perhaps, feel like everything was pointless. You will analyse, and question, and wonder. You might be doing that for quite some time.

In the end, though, you will accept and go back to your practice. And actually, the fastest you do, the strongest you are.

Because a defeat is not the end of the world.