Tag: relationships

For you and for me

FabrizioLeave a comment

What’s in it for me?

That’s on our mind when we approach something, whether consciously or unconsciously. We have some idea of what we will get from a situation, from a person, from a request. We play scenarios in our head and expect to maximise the value we can get.

Of course, everybody does that at the same time, and so focusing on what you could get is probably not going to take you very far.

Challenge yourself and start with: Here is what’s in it for you.

Once that becomes the default, you will find you can change the world.

Wrong turn

FabrizioLeave a comment

When things take a wrong turn, the only thing you can hope for is that you have cherished the moments you have had until then.

If everything is a hustle, a battle, a fight, a competition. What are you left with?

Long-term investment

FabrizioLeave a comment

Building good relationships requires that you are in a good relationship with yourself. At the same time, when you are in a good relationship with yourself, it’s often the case that you lose the opportunity to build good relationships.

Use your own inner strength to put strong foundations below the relationships with your partner, with your friends, with your colleagues, with your community.

It’s a long-term investment in well-being.

More and more and more

FabrizioLeave a comment

It’s difficult to let people go where they want to go. It’s difficult in life and at work.

It’s difficult because since we were kids we have been told not to go there, not to do this, to just come here. It’s difficult because we see people going their own way as a threat to our own pursue and to our own self. It’s difficult because it is easy to look from the outside and recommend the absolute and perfect course of action. It’s difficult because we have been shown that limiting the possibilities is a way to protect, to shield, to even show we actually care.

It’s difficult. And we need to commit to doing it more and more and more.

You assume

FabrizioLeave a comment

When you start thinking that someone is out to get you, that the decisions they are making are personal and against you, you are making a lot of self-centred assumptions in a split second.

You assume that they know of you.

You assume that they know what is good and bad for you.

You assume that they think of you when making their own decisions.

You assume that they understand the depths of your value and skills.

You assume that they prioritise your circumstances over theirs.

You assume that they care enough to actually bother.

You assume that they are the villain to your own personal script.

Of course, some of these assumptions might be on target. But even just making them, even though you do not know you are making them, consumes a lot of your energy and resources.

Assume instead that they are doing their best for themselves and for the interests they represent.

It almost never is personal. And even when it is, you are far better off assuming it is not.