When you start something new, having the questions right is more important than having the right answers.
Who is going to be impacted by your work?
Who are you serving?
What are their expectations?
Answers can only be found by asking. The fact that they lie somewhere in your previous experience and your knowledge of the world is just a myth.
We would like there to be a simple answer. And the reality, of course, is that there is none.
We would love the answer to be in the next article we read, the next podcast episode we listen to, the next online class we register for – even though we know we will never have the time, or the motivation, or the incentive to actually take it.
We would love our beloved go-to influencer to share their secret sauce. We would pay hard earned money to get it from their very own voice. We are desperate for it, so much so we convince ourselves that if only we would take the recommendation in the latest LinkedIn post they shared, everything would be fine.
The reality, of course, is that there is no secret sauce.
Every situation, every context, every team, every product, every go-to-market, every business model is different. You can apply some of your own previous expertise, or some of someone else’s previous expertise, but you’ll better do it carefully.
Starting with listening and asking loads of questions, seeing what you can take and what you need to drop, agreeing with others on the next important steps to take together.
That’s probably the only bullet that looks somewhat silvery.
Come up with the plan as you go.
What’s the impression you leave on those who are moving on?
What will your churned customer say about the service they got?
What will the exiting employee say about your company’s culture?
What will your colleague say as they transition to the new project?
Clearly, a mismatch emerged at some point. And the way you manage that does matter.
Sometimes you can start a habit by breaking a negative cycle.
If you always check your inbox right before going to sleep, try not doing it just once.
If you spend an increasing amount of time with a repetitive videogame, surprise yourself by not reaching for it at the next occasion.
If you go for your phone as soon as a notification pops up, resist the instict next time – turning off notifications is an easy aid.
Sometimes you can start a habit by nurturing a positive cycle.
If you figure out that calling a friend puts you in a good mood, do that more regularly.
If you realize that reading a book calms your nerves and sparks new ideas, buy a new one once your are done with the next.
If cooking makes you think more carefully about what you are eating, carve some time every day to cook yourself a meal.
Sometimes, all you need is one less.
Sometimes, all you need is one more.
Build enough muscles so that you can always be in a position to defuse.
Be the first one to take responsibility and to say I am sorry in every argument, no matter if it’s trivial or crucial. Even when you think you are right, make it so you will own the fact the relationship is cracking.
That’s a sure way to get unstuck.
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