Tag: feedback

Do it for yourself

FabrizioLeave a comment

In the parenting journey, there comes a time when you realize you have to give your kids control. It happens quite early, to be honest. It’s when they start to go out play with other kids by themselves, without adult’s supervision.

You have to start give them control, even gradually. And be there to help them handle the consequences of the choices they make. Sure, you do that because you want them to grow as independent, resilient human beings. But you do that also for a very egoistic reason: you simply do not have the energy and time to deal with all the questions they have, to asses all the situations they come to you with, to fix all the problems they face.

In the leadership journey, you will find something similar. If you feel overwhelmed, if you find yourself wondering whether your team can do anything without your input, if you want everything under your own supervision. It’s time to give away control.

If not for your team, do it for yourself.

The benefit will be immediate.

Not quite yet

FabrizioLeave a comment

If you give people space, they will grow to fill that space.

Give them a project, a question, a challenge, a responsibility, a team, and more often than not they will rise to the occasion. That’s how growth happen, after all. You might be spending time reading, attending classes, completing certification, and that is of limited value until you test what you have learned on the field.

For most organizations, though, the rule is not quite yet. It is never the right time to give space, as there is always something else that gets in the way.

The end of the quarter.

The launch of a new product.

An important acquisition.

The flattening of the curve.

The upcoming report.

What really gets in the way is fear. What if things will not turn out as planned? A better question, of course, would be: when do things turn out as planned? And an even better one: what is the worst thing that could happen?

If you can’t manage this type of uncertainty, you are a lazy manager in a lazy organization.

I am sure that is not what you want.

Distance and neutrality

FabrizioLeave a comment

Empathy requires distance and neutrality.

It might sound counterintuitive, and still it is an important point.

Only with distance and neutrality you can refrain from judgement and keep the bias for action at bay. Only with distance and neutrality you can avoid being overwhelmed by what the other person is feeling, to the point you might turn into a paladin for their cause (and cut out all the rest).

Empathy is acceptance.

Changing mind

Fabrizio1 Comment

The effort we put in trying to explain we did not change our mind is puzzling.

You misunderstood.

They misunderstood.

You started executing without asking more questions first.

You should have challenged me on that.

The circumstances have changed.

The keyboard has eaten most of my words.

There was a lot of noise when we talked about this.

You assumed you knew, and you didn’t.

I wish you’d listen when I talk.

Changing mind is not the end of the world. Not being sure about what to do, and how to do it, and who should do it, is not the end of the world.

Spoiling a relationship to prove you are right. That is the end of the world.

You’ll never get it

FabrizioLeave a comment

If after 15 months of covid crisis your organization does not have a plan to promote virtual get-togethers with colleagues, it failed.

If the only meetings are work-related meetings, if the participants rarely are from outside your team, if 1-1s keep being cancelled and postponed – because, you know, managers are busy -, it failed.

If there are no conversations around mental health, well-being, separation between work and personal life. If it is not offering some sort of incentives for therapy. It failed.

If the only times the company and the teams meet, it is the managers doing the talking, and all the other employees listening, it failed.

If what gets rewarded is still achieving personal goals, if cooperation is not actively stimulated, if teams are just a way to build walls rather than a way to reach out and help, it failed.

Just because your numbers are cool, it does not mean your people are too.

If you have not understood this during the past 15 months, you’ll probably never get it.