Tag: empathy

Doing nothing

FabrizioLeave a comment

If you want to get everything done today, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you keep your queue open to the latest request, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you force yourself to do a task when you are just not in the right mindset, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you put yourself at the center of a mass distraction, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

If you are asked to explain what you do as you do it, you will most likely end up doing nothing.

There are plenty of ways to do nothing, and arguably just one to actually achieve something.

Take control of your attention.

Holding back

FabrizioLeave a comment

Fear can hold you back, and it can hold back those who look at you for guidance.

As parents, more often than not our own fears fuel the “don’t do that”, “don’t go there”, “that is not safe”. Our kids won’t climb the tree, won’t walk to the grocery shop by themselves, won’t try that stunt with their bikes, won’t go in front of the whole class to present an idea. They are marginally safer, infinitely more anxious and fearful.

And since parenting and leadership are strongly linked, you look at managers and you see how much of their fears dictates their behavior and that of their teams. Better play it safe, please upper management, don’t say when things are wrong, praise everybody, and keep communication to a minimum.

Fear is an important feeling when we label it as such. When instead we avoid it, pretend it’s not there, morph it into reality, then it becomes a blocker for our progress and for the progress of those we care about.

It’s just not worth it.

Slow down

Fabrizio2 Comments

We have gotten used to fast.

We want the world to move fast, we want change to happen overnight, we seek shortcuts and opportunities behind every corner.

We lose sight of the 99%.

And when that feeling is stronger, the only real thing we can do is look inside and ask how we can slow down.

Sleep.

Exercise.

Meditate.

Connect with those you care about.

Put technology aside.

Get rid of dopamine hits.

Trying to change the speed at which our world spins is pointless.

Trying to change the way we perceive such speed is wise.

Reach out

Fabrizio1 Comment

When you are down, reach out.

Even if you don’t feel like it.

Even if you have nothing to say.

Even if you don’t know.

Even if your instict tells you not to risk it.

Even if you are sure nobody would understand.

Even when it’s pouring.

Even when you have been rejected before.

Even if they don’t care.

Connection might well be the single thing that will keep us afloat. Seek it and cultivate it. Even when you don’t feel like it.

Crisis

Fabrizio1 Comment

When crisis hits, make sure you have an answer to these three questions and share that with all those involved.

Who is in charge? This is about establishing who has the responsibility to take us out of the crisis. It does not mean they will do everything, make all decisions, come up with all ideas. It means they are in charge.

How often will people hear from who is in charge? Make a calendar, ensure communication is constant, better if it happens every week, at the same time, on the same channel. If there’s nothing new, share there is nothing new and take the chance to gather thoughts, feelings, ideas, opinions.

What is expected of people involved? This is arguably the most difficult, because asking us to wait is not really an option. Establish clear roles to enable change, make us feel that we are part of the solution, give us a specific purpose. Tell us we matter with facts.

If you tackle the crisis before having answers to these three questions, your efforts will probably do more damage than good.