We’d like to control others. What they think of us, what they do in the projects we lead, what they care about when it’s time to buy, how they feel when we are together.
We’d like to control others, situations, circumstances, luck, misfortune, talent, success.
We’d like to control all of that and all we can control is our little self.
Better become good at that at least.
If you are constantly in a situation where you know and your colleague does not.
Where you have the answers and your colleague does not.
Where your job is better than the job of your colleague.
Where your opinion matters more than the opinion of your colleague.
Where you understand while your colleague doesn’t really get it.
Where you have all the expertise while your colleague really just is a junior.
Where you make decisions while your colleague waits for your decisions to be made.
How can you really expect to build a relationship with them?
This is true.
You are only as good as the people who will miss you when you’re gone.
Also, make the memories kind and soft. Make it so that the lack of your presence will not be a burden, but a reminder of chance and possibility. Make them miss you not for who you are but for who they were when you were around. Make it a longing, not a begging.
That’s legacy.
Respect.
For some that means being kind to others. For some that means always telling it like it is. For some it is a matter of not wasting anybody’s time. For some it’s about making everyone feel involved.
Professional.
For some that means wearing a suit during workdays. For some that means being calm and in control. For some it is a matter of delivering on the promises. For some it’s about using a given lingo when talking and presenting.
Productive.
For some that means delivering a lot. For some that means delivering well. For some it is a matter of the time it takes to do things. For some it’s about money.
The point being, there is no absolute agreement on what things mean. And just because others have a different definition, it does not mean they are less committed to achieve exactly what you say you also want to achieve.
Your role in all that is to accept this very little fact – that different people have different definitions for the same thing. Not better, not worst. Just different.
Plus, you ought it to yourself and others to set some boundaries for your own definitions, boundaries that people should not overstep if they want to do business with you.
The rest is harmony.
One of the biggest problems of companies that are growing is people turnover. The faster the growth, the bigger the problem.
Hiring and onboarding new people is a huge obstacle to further growth. And since growth is chaotic and managers don’t know how to manage (people), many will increasingly be demotivated, will burn out, or will simply leave. It is a spiral from which it is very difficult to get out.
The only antidote to this problem is start caring about people early on. Shifting the managerial approach from one more deal, one more feature, one more campaign to one more hour spent chatting with colleagues, both within your team and cross-functionally. Over-communicate and leave space to listen. Ensure that the team you already have will be a strong foundation for the growth that is coming.
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