Category: self-help

Compromised

FabrizioLeave a comment

When you underplay a problem that was brought to your attention, you are compromising the relationship.

You might have very good reasons to do that. Perhaps the problem is not a problem to you. Perhaps you are scared the problem might jeopardize your status. Perhaps you just have no idea what to do about it. Perhaps you are set on your goals and targets and do not want to get distracted.

You pretend it is not there, and the other person is impatiently waiting for your response.

You just have to ask yourself: is it worth it?

Like what you do

FabrizioLeave a comment

Like what you do is a much better advise than do what you like.

There is fulfillment, completeness, pride in shipping. It is an opportunity that is here and now, while on the other hand embarking in the search for a passion pushes our target always a bit farther.

Doing is all there is, and when you make of it a habit, you have already achieved your success.

They started it!

Fabrizio2 Comments

If someone does something you would not, that is not a good reason to go and do it yourself.

Sticking to your values, your best behavior, the best version of yourself is easy when everyone around is nice, pleasant, and accommodating. But can you do it also when you meet the asshole, when your boss sets a negative example, when your group is up to something you would not normally be proud of?

They started it! is a weak excuse for grown ups.

Disappointment

FabrizioLeave a comment

Disappointment is about anticipated rewards.

Sometimes the anticipated rewards are the result of our ambitions, aspirations, dreams, desires, experiences. We are active part in building up our expectations, to the point that it often becomes impossible for the actual thing to satisfy them.

Sometimes they are set by others with their ads, content, hype-building tactics, public relations, supposed culture. They prepare a mental image for us that buys us in and eventually turns out to be just too good to be true.

Disappointment is a fundamental part of life. The first type helps us stay grounded, adjust our course, understand how things work. The second type tells us about relationships, who to trust, to what extent and in which circumstances.

And most of all, disappointment is a reminder that while we often govern the inputs, we have little to no power over the outcomes.

That is fine.

Feelings and stories

FabrizioLeave a comment

If it feels like you are stuck in life, try expanding the time frame. You might be the same as one month ago, or one year ago, but what about three years, five years, ten years ago?

And should that not work, try changing the stick you use to measure. You might have been in the same role for a while, but what about your personal life, your circle of friends, your involvement with the local community?

The point is, if it feels like you are stuck in life, it is most likely just a feeling, and feelings come and go, as long as you do not transform them into stories.