Category: leadership

Nothing wrong

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I did nothing wrong.

Defensiveness is often the go-to strategy when we are put on the spot. In all honesty, though, we would be more accurate saying I did mean nothing wrong, or even better My intentions were in the right place.

When somebody negatively reacts to something we did or said, something clicks in our mind that forces us to preserve our reputation. It is a natural mechanism, nothing easily preventable, but if you think about it, that “something” is assuming that: 1. we are infallible; 2. if we fail, we fail deeply, as a person, as a human being.

Both are false, of course. And so, next time you feel the urge to say I did nothing wrong, stop for a moment and try instead asking How did what I said felt?, or What can I do better next time?, or even How can I make this right?

It is only by avoiding to take things personally and by expressing a real interest in what the others feel and perceive that we can build strong relationships.

And become, little by little, an improved version of a human being.

Winning machine

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When you have a new idea, it is quite difficult to avoid having all your following thoughts gravitate around it.

If a new slogan comes to you in the middle of the night, all the successive iterations will just be slight variations.

If you think at a solution for a problem you have had for a while, you will expand and stretch the solution until it gets good enough to actually cover at least a small part of the problem.

If the process you have just implemented has proven successful, you will use it until it is too late to understand it is no longer up-to-date.

A possible way around this could be to ask different people to come up with a new idea. Or to foster an environment in which it is normal that different people come up with a variety of new ideas. If you match with a process that clearly defines what gets picked, what gets postponed and what gets rejected, you have a winning machine.

The temptation

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Having an idea, an opinion, some knowledge, a preference comes with a strong temptation. The temptation to overwhelm, to impose, to change, to replace.

We cannot be wrong, and therefore all that is around us must accomodate our view.

This temptation grows stronger as two things happen.

First, the more we accumulate experience the more we think what has worked so far will also work here and now. Second, the more we are high up in a hierarchy the more we expect it is our right to have better ideas, opinions, knowledge, preferences.

Executive, managers, leaders regularly give in to this temptation. And it is not a matter of being right or wrong. It is more a problem of breaking morale, of mining trust, of diminishing the value you can get from people who work with you.

Temptations can be resisted though. It takes practice and discipline, but it is not impossible. And in this case it will translate in an act of kindness that people will reward you for.

Hide and run

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What do you do when you forget to get back to a colleague, when the day ends without you returning that call, when the follow up you promised on that matter does not happen, when you postpone that conversation you were supposed to have?

The truth is, most of the time, we just go down a path that takes us further away from the right thing.

And so we avoid the colleague, we silence the phone, we build excuses around the promise, we postpone the conversation until it gets forgotten. We hide. We run from a mere oversight until it spirals into a complete failure. This is how much we hate admitting we did something wrong.

Of course, all of the process of hiding and running takes a lot of resources. Energy and time that will be better employed once we find the courage to say “my bad, let’s move on”.

How much more could you achieve if only you would learn to say “I am sorry”?

A new tool

FabrizioLeave a comment

Things that might turn around a difficult situation in business.

Asking for help.

Sitting down with the people involved and listen.

Asking somebody who has been there before.

Interviewing your best customers.

Communicating.

Sharing your vision and make sure any decision made falls within its scope.

Allocating extra time for those who will be dissatisfied.

Learning to say no to every opportunities.

Communicating some more.

Offering concrete help to those who will be left behind.

Rather than just using “we” in presentations, live as “we”.

Overcommunicating.

Things that will NEVER turn around a difficult situation in business.

A new tool.