Category: culture

Influencing others

FabrizioLeave a comment

There is no behavior that you can promote without embracing it fully.

Telling your team that they should not work the weekends while you are working all weekends is not going to be effective.

Telling friends that they should call you more often while you never call is not going to be effective.

Telling your kids that they should not lie while they see you lying every day is not going to be effective.

We have a lot of power to influence others’ actions, we are just not confident enough to acknowledge that.

Appearance and substance

FabrizioLeave a comment

The way you behave with people is at least as important as the words you speak.

The story you tell is at least as important as the subject you are narrating.

The marketing you deliver is at least as important as the product you have come up with.

The point is, there is appearance and there is substance. Pretending one does not exist just because it makes you uncomfortable is heavily limiting your own possibilities to succeed.

Make the effort to align them instead. Make behavior and words, story and subject, marketing and product go hand in hand. Bring one at the same level of the other. Make them support each other and be in harmony.

That’s when the feeling of uneasiness will just go away.

Misstep

FabrizioLeave a comment

Reconsider your decision, particularly if you have taken it under emotional stress – I was mad when I said that.

Acknowledge the relationship – I do care about you.

Say that you are sorry and ask for help to move forward – I am sorry and I would like to hear how you think we can get past this impasse.

Nobody said it was easy.

The biggest difference

FabrizioLeave a comment

A difficult step towards awareness is appreciating that we are not so special after all.

The things we think, the emotions we feel, the fears that get us stuck, the ambitions that drive us, the confusion in the face of uncertainty, the defensiveness when we fail. They are common to many and they do not make us any different from all others human beings.

Once we are fine with that, then we can dedicate time to what truly matters: how we react to all that and to an ever-changing world.

That’s where the biggest difference is.

Minimal reaction

FabrizioLeave a comment

Others will never be as excited as we are about what we do. Nor will they be as committed, as ready, as present, as purposeful, as proactive, as determined.

The first thing we ought to do when we care about something is to let go of how others will relate to it.

And that’s where “do what you like” is an advice that actually makes sense. Find something that you like, something you would do no matter what. How others will react to it is then going to be a byproduct of doing that can only add to the pleasure. Even when the reaction is minimal.