Category: culture

Selfish and harmful

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For a very long time, when somebody would pay me a compliment I was going to diminish it.

Either I was going to switch the attention on the indefinite number of things that were still far from worthy of a compliment (in my work, in my deliverables, in myself, in the world), or I was just going to play down the importance of what I did with reference to the bigger picture (this is not going to help us achieve what we want anyway!).

Somehow, I now realize this is a selfish and harmful thing to do.

It does not give resolution to the person paying the compliment, therefore fostering a culture that is not incline to doing so. And it tends to increase self-expectations, setting yourself up for continuous disappointment.

“Thank you!” is a great way to reply to a compliment.

There will always be ample time later to think about what is still missing and to consider the value of the compliment for your broader story.

Giving time

Fabrizio1 Comment

Donating to charities or impactful causes might not be for everyone, but there’s a very accessible way to give that we can all practice regularly.

Giving time.

Giving time is personal, important, empathetic and transformational. No matter how busy we are, we can always find time to give. Either by mentoring, by coaching, by listening, by sharing our experience with those who have a different one, by merely being totally present.

There’s no training needed in giving time, you can start as soon as now. And the great thing is, the more you are in a bad place, the better giving time will make you feel.

[…] instead of moving away from your work when burnout strikes, you may actually need to move closer to it, albeit in a different manner. That different manner is “giving back” to your field. This can take many forms, including volunteering and mentoring, but the basic gist is that you should focus on helping others.

Brad Stulberg and Steve Magness, Peak Performance

Enamored

Fabrizio1 Comment

Doing more of what you have done so far is seldom the recipe for growth.

This is valid both for individuals and organizations. At different stages, there’s a need to identify what can take you to the next level. And the more you can do this without putting what took you so far front and center, the more likely it is that the exercise will be successful.

Studying hard will most likely get you a degree, but won’t get you that far once you land your first job.

Putting all your marketing budget in acquisition can be effective at early stages, but the value of this operation will decrease as your company grows.

Taking on different projects and trying various things can be great when you are in your twenties, but it’s going to become counterproductive once you get older.

Assuming a directive approach to leadership can work as long as your team is extremely junior, but as they start making experience you’ll most likely get more benefit (and commitment) from letting go of the reins.

This is the tricky part.

Once you find something that works, you’ll probably have to adapt to changing conditions soon enough and find a new way. Don’t get too enamored.

We could try this

FabrizioLeave a comment

A dialogue that is often heard in organizations of all sizes and in all industries is the following.

Manager: We have taken the decision to do this. Go and do it.
Employees: Who has taken the decision? Based on what? Why are we doing this? How does this fit with all the rest we are already doing?

There are two problems with this approach.

First of all, managers very rarely share information about the decision-making process. This is problematic, since if you want people to be committed you probably need to give them a better idea of what is going on. Chances are, though, that the decision-making process is one or two persons following their intuition, and so there’s probably not much more context to add to the outcome itself.

The second problem is that it sets the employees mainly as executors. It is challenging to give your best when you are not involved in shaping what needs to happen, and if that is the case the manager can already expect some sort of resistance, either in the form of low-quality work or in the form of time-delays.

A far better way to handle this dialogue would be the following.

Manager: We have decided we want to be there next year. How do we make it happen?
Employees: We could try this. And this. And this.

Of course, it sounds scary, as it gives control away. Expect a lot of ideas, initial chaos, and perhaps a bunch of changes in direction (also the other approach has such features, they are just more hidden). And yet, this is the only way to prepare your employees to give their best, to act for what they have prepared, and to deliver incremental value to the whole organization.

Give it a try.

It’s the stories

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It’s not what happened in our past that determines what will happen in our future.

Instead, it’s the stories we tell ourselves (and others) about what happened in the past that can have a profound impact on the stories we tell ourselves (and others) today and tomorrow.

We build narratives to make sense of what is going on, and they are powerful. But the good thing is, we can shape those narratives in a way that gives us purpose (vs takes purpose away), that shows a path (vs ends on a wall), that builds a future (vs destroys the past). And the even better thing is, the hope we give with our stories is contagious.

Let’s carefully work on our stories.