Tag: values

Who thinks what

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There’s what you think you are. And that’s where you should invest most of your time. Understanding what you stand for, figuring out what you like, setting your own boundaries, and managing your triggers. You have full control on this.

There’s what others think you are. And that’s something you can’t do much about. Because others will always use their past, their experiences, their fears, their dreams, their thoughts, their values, their versions of the world to process what you are doing. You just can’t change that.

And there’s what you think others think you are. And that’s dangerous. That’s when we give up figuring ourselves out and instead use others to highlight everything we don’t like about us – our body, our mind, our traits, our personality, our behavior. You are giving up control doing that.

So tempting

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It is so tempting to think you have the right solution.

To take things in your hands and ask of others that they do as you tell them.

To schedule just one more meeting and go through what everybody is doing, assign blame, share opinions, drive action.

To comment on everything as it is happening and inspire urgency.

To check, and double-check, and triple-check, and check just one more time.

To put people, projects, tasks into boxes and then complain that things are slow, siloed, not properly communicated.

It is so tempting to take ownership and control.

And it is the exact opposite of what you should do.

Even when you feel broken

Fabrizio1 Comment

It is true.

Sometimes you need an easy win.

Sometimes you need somebody who does not ask you to be someone else.

Sometimes you need a change of scenery, or a change of pace, or a change of people.

Sometimes you need to get in touch.

And sometimes you just need to accept and let go.

But it is true.

You can be your own hero, even when you feel broken.

The bottom of it

FabrizioLeave a comment

When someone shares a thing they heard or saw, it’s not only that thing they are sharing. They are also sharing some of their expectations, emotions, opinions.

Keep that mind as you aim to getting to the bottom of it.

The greater good

FabrizioLeave a comment

Many use the greater good only when it matches their own good.

They want to avoid changing their ways.

They aim at pushing back a difficult conversation.

They prefer not to confront their own fault.

And so, they claim that it is for the good of the whole, that they cannot do otherwise, that it’s what makes the most sense.

It’s a cheap excuse to preserve their own comfort.