Tag: resistance

Vicious and virtuous

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Sometimes you can start a habit by breaking a negative cycle.

If you always check your inbox right before going to sleep, try not doing it just once.

If you spend an increasing amount of time with a repetitive videogame, surprise yourself by not reaching for it at the next occasion.

If you go for your phone as soon as a notification pops up, resist the instict next time – turning off notifications is an easy aid.

Sometimes you can start a habit by nurturing a positive cycle.

If you figure out that calling a friend puts you in a good mood, do that more regularly.

If you realize that reading a book calms your nerves and sparks new ideas, buy a new one once your are done with the next.

If cooking makes you think more carefully about what you are eating, carve some time every day to cook yourself a meal.

Sometimes, all you need is one less.

Sometimes, all you need is one more.

Build your muscles

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Build enough muscles so that you can always be in a position to defuse.

Be the first one to take responsibility and to say I am sorry in every argument, no matter if it’s trivial or crucial. Even when you think you are right, make it so you will own the fact the relationship is cracking.

That’s a sure way to get unstuck.

Opinions are sentiments

Fabrizio1 Comment

People can easily come up with an opinion on almost anything.

And two things are good to keep in mind.

First, opinions are opinions. They are more influenced by sentiment or feeling than reason. They are great ways to get started, but poor ways to get you across the finish line. The sooner you move from opinions to facts, the closer you will be to success.

Second, saying that you don’t have an opinion on a given topic is not a sign of weakness or dumbness. And most of all, it does not prevent you from taking action. Moving from opinions to facts is equally important when the opinions are not yours.

Promote mistakes

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Speak about your mistakes often, particularly if you are in a position of power. Tell about what went wrong and what you did learn. Anticipate how the next time will be.

It’s also a great way to assess people around you and the environment you are in. If you recently joined a company, and nobody talks about mistakes ever, particularly when everyone is listening, that is not a company that knows how to learn and promote innovation.

Mistakes are essential. Promote them to become better.

Stand out

Fabrizio1 Comment

One of the things that will make you stand out most in business (and not only) is to close the circle on your promises.

This is true for individual contributors, teams, departments, and organizations as a whole.

If you promise something that you know you can’t deliver, or that you consistently don’t deliver over a period of time, the promise is most likely a way for you to get out of a difficult conversation, an awkward moment, a temporary discomfort.

It is not worth it.

Say only what you know you’ll do. And if you end up not doing it, give a reason and follow up.

When you meet your commitments, you build trust, gain confidence — look, you really can do it! — and grow the kind of backbone needed to say no when you truly can’t take something on.

Whitney Johnson, You Have to Stop Canceling and Rescheduling Things. Really.