Tag: interviewing

A dear friend

FabrizioLeave a comment

Life is a combination of different parts.

Yourself. The people you get to build ties with. Your family. The work you do. Your beliefs and principles. Your well-being. The job you do to benefit your community. The partners you choose.

And when something bad happens in one part of our life – we get fired, a relationship ends, we are stuck in our development, etc. – it is very common to magnify that until it becomes the totality and the absolute reality of our entire existence.

To put things back in perspective, we might need help. And perspective is always a dear friend.

Journey over destination

FabrizioLeave a comment

Since early on, they tell us it’s going to be easy.

That most things are natural, that talent is innate, that success is overnight. That relationships are a given. That having kids is just as simple as drinking a cup of coffee. That the way you go into the world, your purpose, your principles, are going to be very clear and eventually magically manifest in front of you. Without any effort.

Instead, it’s tough.

Almost every thing that is worth something requires blood, sweat, and tears.

And that’s probably what makes it worth it.

Journey over destination.

Doing and not doing

FabrizioLeave a comment

Doing and not doing.

That’s where the difference is between success and failure.

It’s not quality and quantity.

It’s not perfection and sloppiness.

It’s not expertise and incompetence.

It’s not 1,000 and 1 (of whatever you want to look at).

It’s doing and not doing. That’s what sets us apart.

Empty-handed

FabrizioLeave a comment

The moment you make an argument personal is the moment you lose it.

If your position is right because the other is wrong, or is an idiot, or did not do a good enough job, or is not as competent, your position is extremely weak. And even if you are right, there’s no way you can prove them wrong.

Keep discussions around facts instead and be ready to accept other opinions as valid and worth your consideration.

Arguments are negotiations, and no negotiation can leave one party empty-handed.

Winning mentality

FabrizioLeave a comment

When we lose, it’s easy to play down the whole situation.

It was not so important after all.

Others were lucky.

That single decision was unfair and really cut my chances.

I did not give my best, but if I would have..

The context was heavily against me.

It’s a defence mechanism that puts space between us and the failure so that we don’t feel like such. And it tells of a tendency to see loss as failure.

Of course, if we want to avoid losing more in the future, we’d be better off by owning the loss and trying to see what went wrong. What it is that is under our control and that we can do better.

That’s the sign of a winning mentality.