Tag: feedback

No solution

FabrizioLeave a comment

Caring about others, about a situation, about an outcome it’s not finding an immediate solution.

It is more about persistence.

Asking how someone is, inquiring about the status of a project, ensuring people who come to you with issues, fears, troubles, complaints feel heard and respected, coming up with ways to help and continuing doing that when help is rejected, truly listening and deeply caring. Doing this over a period of time, regularly, without waiting for others to ask, without missing an opportunity to show that it matters to you, without assuming that having nothing new to say is having nothing to say at all.

We are all very good at offering our support. We are also equally good at finding any possible way to escape from having to actually give it.

Would you take it?

FabrizioLeave a comment

Are you into leadership because of the power, the role, the status, or because of the challenges, the responsibility, the people that allow you to lead?

It seems like a trivial question, and the answer is probably, for most, somewhat in the middle.

But I can’t count the leaders who stop at the prestige and forgo the difficult part.

What if we would start presenting promotions into leadership roles in a different way? And so, instead of saying.

You did well so far, here is a promotion, a new title, and a salary raise.

We would say.

You did well so far. Here is a chance to take this team and make it awesome, to listen to their ideas and ensure the ones that make sense get developed and the others are put on hold (perhaps forever), to raise their engagement with the company and their role even in the face of bad news – especially in the face of bad news. Do you take it?

Managers do really need to start thinking at leadership in a different way, otherwise it will continue to be the professional graveyard of people with monetary and status ambitions.

Outbursts

FabrizioLeave a comment

If you can delay your actions for just a few minutes, hold off your come back until the next break, take a couple of deep breaths, put the computer aside late in the afternoon and sleep on the issue.

Then you will find yourself focusing on the content rather than the emotion.

And when you do that, you will realize that people respond to content remarks much better than to emotional outbursts.

Someone has modified your work without letting you know. Emotional outburst: that is unacceptable. Content remark: I like this and that, I preferred the previous version here and there.

A colleague has sent you a demanding email that overwhelms you with requests. Emotional outburst: I am busy, I cannot do any of this. Content remark: I am working on a project, and I can help with this and that.

Your manager has mentioned your role is going to change focus in the coming months. Emotional outburst: here we go again, it seems every time I get good at something you raise the bar for me. Content remark: I see why this happens, and I am confident I can do this and that, while perhaps we might want to hire somebody to take care of the other aspect.

Emotions are important. They tell us what we care about, what triggers us, what makes us uncomfortable, what we can and cannot accept. Where we draw the line.

Yet, when we act out of emotions, we lose opportunities to make the change we want to see.

Focusing on content is something we can all get better at.

My door is always open

Fabrizio2 Comments

If your door is always open, you should go out in the world and see what’s going on.

Way to often the open door is a lazy excuse. Sure, come to me with your questions, doubts, concerns, just don’t expect me to ask first. Because, well, you do not care.

We keep reading of how change is difficult, of how important it is to communicate, of how keeping people involved is critical to its success.

Is then my door is always open the best we can resort to?

If you care, actively ask, seek input, practice empathy, pretend candour.

If you have it all figured out instead, keep leaving your door open. No one will bother your certainty.

Fan

Fabrizio2 Comments

If you want people around you to be motivated, be their fan.

Cheer for them, clap for them, believe in them. Tell them they will be successful. Find what they are good at and nudge them. Promote them, advocate for their cause, put their work forward, write them references, and be their marketing department.

Particularly when things are not going the way they were expecting.

We are very good at being fan of political parties, sport clubs, divisive issues, social groups. And for some reasons, we are very bad at being fans of colleagues, team members, managers, partners, friends, peers.

Start being a fan of the people that are important to you. Your world will change.