Tag: feedback

Discomfort

FabrizioLeave a comment

You have an idea.

And that idea initiates some feelings. Excitement, perhaps. Or anticipation. Or frustration. Or anger. Or fear.

And to mitigate that, you take an action, right there, in the moment.

You send a message.

You ask a question.

You check the status.

You share the idea.

You push for delivery.

You do it yourself.

The point here is that the shorter the time between the idea and the action, the more the action is not about the idea, but about the feeling and your desire to push it away. To clarify, to push it onto somebody else. To give away the ownership of that thing that makes you uncomfortable.

On the other hand, of course, the longer the time between the idea and the action, the more the action is exactly about the idea. The feeling has dissipated by then, and you have probably learned something about yourself, about the feeling, about the idea, and about how to make the action right on point.

Learn to live with your discomfort.

The reason

FabrizioLeave a comment

Everything happens for a reason.

But contrary to what most of us think, we have more control on the “reason” than we like to admit. The reason is not something external, something that others or circumstances impose on us, something that we are forced to accept.

The reason is a narrative.

And we control the narrative.

Shifting perspective

FabrizioLeave a comment

The worst mistake a manager can make is taking decisions as if everyone would be like them, think like them, adhere to their same set of values and principles, care as much as them, earn as much as them.

Shifting perspective and accepting that others have different views seems to be one of the biggest challenges when you are in a position of power.

Enough data

FabrizioLeave a comment

A little data is always better than no data. Because no data is the realm of opinions, hearsay, gossips, and past experiences.

A lot of data is sometimes better than a little data. Because a lot of data can be confusing, irrelevant, misleading.

A good amount of data is difficult to strike. Because when you start getting data, you want more, and that’s when you end up with a lot of data and the problems from the paragraph above.

The point is that data is useful and should be used, as long as, at some point, you can say “enough!”.

Full circle

FabrizioLeave a comment

When we are kids, we think everybody is interested in our opinion, in what we think, even when we know absolutely nothing about the topic. It might be because our parents have taught us that we matter, that we are the centre of the world. And so of course what we have to say is relevant to the situation. No matter what situation.

Then, we grow up, and somehow we develop some kind of filters. Some do, at least. We start getting feedback that what we say is not really useful, we notice others putting themselves into awkward situations we want to avoid, we are reminded of our limits, and we realise that not everything we have in our head is worth sharing.

Unfortunately, that seems to stop in a couple of instances, at least.

  1. When our identity is hidden.
  2. When we are in a position of power.

The second case is incredibly similar to what happens to kids. We are surrounded by people who mainly confirm that we are important, that we matter, that we know, that we are better. And we lose the ability to distance our thoughts from what is needed, appropriate, relevant.

That’s a risk that’s worth keeping in mind. Unless we want to come full circle and be just like kids once again.