Tag: fear

Connection

Fabrizio3 Comments

We underestimate the importance of talking with somebody when things are bad.

We tend to close, fantasize, make assumptions, build on our own emotions, point fingers, second guess, and in general spiral down in a hole we can’t get ourselves out of.

There is always somebody to talk to. Sometimes that is your partner, a friend, your boss, the quiet colleague who barely talks in meetings, a mentor, a person you think highly of.

When things are bad, we need connection much more than a solution. And connection is all around us, we just need to be brave enough to reach out and start building it.

The helper

Fabrizio2 Comments

You can’t fight fear.

You cannot pretend it is not there, you cannot walk past it, turn a blind eye to it, give it another name, a different guise, a more appealing shape.

You can’t run from it, outpace it, hide in the shadow of your strenghts and possessions. That is where fear will eventually find you.

You also can’t stop and stand in front of fear. You can’t circle around it, spiral inside of it, let fear feel you are close. That is what fear craves the most.

What you can do, then, is look fear in the eyes.

Get to know it well, hold its hand, and take it with you on your journey.

You can’t fight fear, because fear is not the enemy.

Fear is just the helper.

Let the globe, if nothing else, say this is true:
That even as we grieved, we grew.
That even as we hurt, we hoped.
That even as we tired, we tried.
That we’ll forever be tied together, victorious.
Not because we will never again know defeat, but because we will never again sow division.

Amanda Gorman, The Hill We Climb.

My door is always open

Fabrizio2 Comments

If your door is always open, you should go out in the world and see what’s going on.

Way to often the open door is a lazy excuse. Sure, come to me with your questions, doubts, concerns, just don’t expect me to ask first. Because, well, you do not care.

We keep reading of how change is difficult, of how important it is to communicate, of how keeping people involved is critical to its success.

Is then my door is always open the best we can resort to?

If you care, actively ask, seek input, practice empathy, pretend candour.

If you have it all figured out instead, keep leaving your door open. No one will bother your certainty.

Leave behind

FabrizioLeave a comment

A truth of life is that, at any point in time, we leave behind a wealth of opportunities, almost infinite chances.

And a second truth of life is that we often care much more about what we are leaving behind rather than what we have with us.

I guess the point is, why are you doing what you are doing?

If it is an intentional and purposeful choice, cherish it and dedicate all yourself to it. With no regrets for what could have been, if only.

If it is not an intentional and purposeful choice, you still have a wealth of opportunities and almost infinite chances to pick from.

The time you are not answering this question is the time you will feel incomplete.

Lack of communication

FabrizioLeave a comment

Silence is golden. Lack of communication is not.

One can find comfort in silence. It is a moment of reflection, of expression, of deep connection. Leaders who learn the power of silence are better listeners, and their team members get in a habit of sharing.

Lack of communication is on the opposite side of the spectrum. It is about retreating, hiding, avoiding. Lack of communication digs holes that others will fill with assumptions, fears, and regrets. The more difficult the situation, the wider the holes. Many leaders practice lack of communication, and their team members get in a habit of keeping to themselves.