One of the things that’s more infuriating is acting in a way that does not fit the image we have of ourselves.

Raising the voice when we like to think we are calm and understanding.

Cheating at a game when we like to think we are fair and honest.

Gossiping to fit in when we like to think we are open and trustworthy.

And the funny thing is that it’s true whether we have a clear idea of who we want to be or not.

But if we don’t know what we want to be, we’ll never figure out what infuriates us, nor we will ever do anything to correct that.

For the best or for the worst

You can set rules for the best case scenario or you can set rules for the worst case scenario.

When you use the best case scenario as a basis, you trust that things will progress well, that people are trustworthy, that nothing terrible or horrible will happen, that “bad” is a situation that can still be managed without much pain.

When you use the worst case scenario as a basis, you look at what will go wrong, at those who will betray you or not keep their part of the deal, at principles that need to be protected, at a “good” situation that is very difficult to digest.

Socially responsible

Many companies claim that they will be changing the World – or the way the World does this and that. Few even actually understand what changing the World means.

In Finland, a local grocery chain has declared themselves “bully-free zone” (article linked in Finnish). And it’s a fantastic win.

Not because it’s their business. Not because they make money from it. Not because they are getting free publicity.

But because it makes sense.

  • Bullying is a problem, in Finland like anywhere else.
  • Bullying happens mainly at school or around schools.
  • In Finland in particular, kids go to school and back home on their own, from as early as 7. That makes the journey home-school-home a problem for a bullied kid.
  • This grocery chain has a lot of local stores, often not far from schools.
  • Stores employ familiar adults (you shop there every day), they are open long hours, they are well lighted (Finland gets long dark days in winter), and there’s typically other people around.
  • So, they promote that every employee at their grocery chain is a safe adult for kids to turn to when bullied.

It must be one of the best executed corporate social responsibility campaigns ever.

The bane

Busy is the bane.

And sometimes, you are busy. So much so that being busy becomes a description of your permanent self, more than a temporary state.

To get out of it, make a list of the things that are making you busy. And ask yourself two questions.

  1. Are those things my responsibility? Because if they are not, you are doing somebody else’s job.
  2. Could those things be somebody else’s responsibility? Perhaps a colleague who is looking for an advancement, or a freelancer who is looking for more work.

Once you unlock that conversation with yourself, you are ready to start setting boundaries and delegating.


If your dream is something you are 100% sure you will be achieving, something you are comfortable with, something you have already done before, that’s not a dream.

If your project is something that no one else has ever achieved, something that is not well defined, something that will take years to complete, that’s not a project.

Using the right definitions and assumptions for the right thing will bring you close to success.