When you extend beyond your domain, you stretch past your comfort zone and find things you have never met before. It’s the way you learn, and it’s also the way you collapse under the weight of everything that is new.
Your purpose is your capstone.
Category: self-help
What to aim for
The biggest problem with self-help books, business reviews, parenting blogs, marketing podcasts is that they give you a kick when your mind is at peace and make you feel awful the exact same moment things get hectic and you fail to follow their advice.
Hearing about what somebody else has done in similar circumstances is not going to shield us from pain, frustration, anger, and thousands of other feelings when the situation comes to us.
Life is tough, no matter what.
Finding your way, the way you can call your own and be proud of, is what you should aim for.
The good enough time
We know we should add the salary ranges to our job ads, but we are reviewing the salary level for internal employees and we do not want to send the wrong message. As soon as we are done with that …
I know I should take on new challenges and find something new, but I have this very important project to take care of. As soon as I am done with that …
I know I should spend more quality time with my family, but I am having a very busy period at work. As soon as that is over …
We know we should get to posting more often on our blog, but we have no good writer in our team. As soon as we can hire one …
The fact is, there’s never a perfect time to do the things we are supposed to do.
There’s a good enough time though.
It is now.
Grounded
We are bad at estimating and predicting. Our gut feeling is nothing more than a feeling. We have opinions and ideas that are, for the most part, pretty average. In almost every situation, there is at least someone else who is more prepared, more qualified, more worthy than we are. When we think we are giving advice, we are actually mostly telling others to do what we have not found the courage to do ourselves. We are different and unique, yet not necessarily better, more prepared, or smarter.
When we remain grounded, it is much easier to appreciate ourselves and others.
A difference that matters
There are two different mindsets with which you can approach a request for help.
One defaults to figuring out how the act of helping does impact one’s own routine.
Does it mean I will have to wake up earlier? Does it mean I will have to postpone my planned holiday? Does it mean I will have to renounce a relaxing evening watching my favourite TV series?
The other defaults to caring about how the act of helping does impact the other person’s life.
The two mindsets often have very similar outcomes. Because when somebody asks for help, people in general tend to give help.
The difference though is in how you feel about helping – and whether or not you will seek to help more in the future – and in how the other person feels about you helping – and whether or not they will seek help more freely in the future.
It is a difference that matters.
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